PIRANHA 3DD (2012) Review

Directed by: John Gulager

Starring: Danielle Panabaker, Matt Bush, David Koechner

PIRANHA 3D was quite simply a bad movie but at least it was entertaining and had some semblance of plot. This sequel however is not just bad but terrible, it has the thinnest of plots and unlikeable characters.
Obviously PIRANHA 3DD is not supposed to be some high class horror movie and I understand that, but this movie was completely unnecessary and brought nothing new to the table.

In the aftermath of the Lake Victoria incident in the first film, the once hot tourist destination is now a ghost town. But at least the piranha are gone right? Well no, it seems that they're back and this time they are out to terrorise the newly opened water park The Big Wet. The Big Wet is an adult oriented water park with sleazy tag lines and lots of nude females. Even the lifeguards are strippers! Entrepreneur Chet (Koechner) has poured all of his money into creating this park and he has big plans for its opening day. Unfortunately his stepdaughter Maddy has discovered that there is a real threat that piranhas could get into the water park and create a bloodbath. Chet isn't put off by this though and so goes on with the grand opening. Obviously the piranhas enter the park and everything goes horribly wrong.

PIRANHA 3DD promises 'twice the terror, double the D's' and it certainly delivers on the latter. There are enough wet, bouncing breasts here to make any 14 year old boy jizz in his pants. When it comes to terror however, the movie is seriously lacking and the blood and death scenes are actually a step down from the previous film. Another thing PIRANHA 3DD has tried to add is humor, from Ving Rhames' shotgun prosthetic leg to David Hasselhoff's cameo. Unfortunately all of this is just cheap laughs and quite frankly I didn't find it funny at all. I also fail to see the reason for the movie being presented in 3D, other than to lure teenage boys with the promise of big breasts bouncing around in three dimensions. There were only a couple of real 3D moments and they just seemed cheap and tacked on.