INBRED (2012) Review

Directed by: Alex Chandon
Starring: Jo Hartley, James Doherty, Chris Waller

A movie titled INBRED. Pretty predictable isn't it? A bunch of city kids find themselves stalked by inbred rednecks somewhere in the deep south of the US right? Wrong. In fact this particular film takes place in the UK, which is something that intrigued me right away. What are English backwoods inbreds like? Do they drink tea and eat scones? Who the fuck knows, the best thing to do here is jump right into the movie and see what happens.

Kate (Hartley) and Jeff (Doherty) are driving a quartet of troubled youths through the English countryside, heading to a small town. This retreat is supposed to be some sort of project to help the four kids. Somehow. But that’s not important. What’s important is that after arriving at their run-down shithole of a vacation house they put all of their mobile phones in a bag and leave them behind (great idea guys!) then decide to take a trip to the local pub. As soon as they open the door and step inside all eyes are upon them. These eyes happen to belong to a throng of greasy, dirty, stringy-haired fellows with bad teeth and an appearance that suggests they are all each other’s brothers, uncles and sons. In fact only the barkeeper seems to be a normal, friendly guy. He even makes the group of newcomers a fresh batch of lemonade. Sure it tastes like warm piss but hey, what are you gonna do? At least it was free. He even sells them some homemade snacks which look suspiciously like shrivelled up, hairy pieces of person. What a nice guy.

The city folk head out to an old abandoned train yard for what I assume is supposed to be some sort of fun, team-building scavenger hunt. However Dwight (Waller) (the douche bag of the group) manages to turn it into a ‘let’s smash the absolute fuck out of everything’ activity. Two of the other youths have a run in with a pair of backwoods freaks before the others come to intervene. Unfortunately while trying to be a tough motherfucker Jeff falls and cuts his leg open on a big chunk of steel. Blood everywhere.
Back at the pub they ask somebody to call an ambulance, and this is the point where everything turns to shit.

So I suppose apart from the setting it is pretty predictable, until we get to the killing that is. Although the English villains are just as sinister as their American counterparts, these enterprising British inbreds aren't just intent on making their victims squeal like piggies or carving them up for their dinner. No, they have decided to make a spectacle of it. The whole town turns up to watch. It’s a fucking hit. Even the nice barkeeper gets involved, blackfacing himself up and putting on a spiffy red jacket like a circus ringleader. Then he announces the main attractions, which I won’t reveal. Let’s just say that they involve vegetables, animals and other things.
Speaking of killing though we should talk about the gore and effects. First of all there is plenty of the red stuff and some good looking practical effects. But there is also quite a bit of CGI that I found a little distracting. Overall though it’s not too bad. Some of the death scenes are quite unique too.

So I guess in the end INBRED isn't as predictable as you might first expect. There isn't anything groundbreaking brought to the table but there are enough fresh touches to keep you interested. And more importantly it’s a fun movie. I particularly liked the attitude of the inbreds themselves. Rather than sprinting through the woods in hot pursuit of their victims they take a more care-free approach, skipping along singing old folky songs and leaving the escapees to the mercy of their booby-traps. It’s a shame about the CGI but at least they haven’t gone completely overboard with it and had the good sense to use it in collaboration with some good old practical stuff. And as far as backwoods inbred movies go it’s a hell of a lot better than what that piece of shit WRONG TURN franchise has turned into. If you see one British, backwoods inbred film this year make sure it is INBRED.

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